S2. E40. Off the Cuff: Are you Open to Feedback?

Natalie: 00:00:00

It can be dangerous to only hear your voice.

2

: 00:00:04

Sometimes you need to be open to feedback.

3

: 00:00:08

On the weekend, I attended a workshop.

4

: 00:00:10

It was virtual and it was

supposed to be an hour and a half.

5

: 00:00:16

And after the first hour of the

workshop, I remember thinking to

6

: 00:00:19

myself, wow, the webinar has really

taught me absolutely nothing.

7

: 00:00:26

And what the title of the webinar was

and what it proposed to be teaching

8

: 00:00:33

attendees was nothing of the sort.

9

: 00:00:37

Really, it was this guy just kind

of talking about his experience and

10

: 00:00:41

talking about all of his past successes,

talking about his backstory and how he

11

: 00:00:46

can now use that program to help you.

12

: 00:00:49

But it wasn't even clear how

exactly it would help you.

13

: 00:00:52

There was no tangible information

other than, trust me, I have a

14

: 00:00:56

system that works that would make

you want to try it for yourself.

15

: 00:01:01

He didn't go through step one to give

you a preview, take you through it so

16

: 00:01:06

you could see how it works for yourself.

17

: 00:01:08

And you could at least go and apply that.

18

: 00:01:11

Because I do think that, you know, if

you're going to teach somebody and you

19

: 00:01:14

want someone to buy your methods, you

should at least get them a little bit for

20

: 00:01:17

free so that they can understand if they

want to work with you or if they want

21

: 00:01:20

to purchase whatever you have to offer.

22

: 00:01:23

So anyways, I was just thinking to myself,

wow, this has been a waste of an hour.

23

: 00:01:27

And a part of me was like, I can just

hang up off the zoom at any time.

24

: 00:01:30

But I was like, no.

25

: 00:01:31

There's going to be value

at some point, maybe.

26

: 00:01:34

And I was kind of doing other

things, so I didn't really mind

27

: 00:01:36

to have it on in the background.

28

: 00:01:38

And eventually some people in the chat

started writing and complaining and

29

: 00:01:41

say, can you get to the point, please?

30

: 00:01:43

We're not getting a lot of value here.

31

: 00:01:45

We're not really learning anything new.

32

: 00:01:47

And the reaction of the presenter was

simply, you can leave, you can hang

33

: 00:01:56

up and leave if this is not for you.

34

: 00:01:58

And the thing is, I understand

if they were saying that, you

35

: 00:02:04

know, his program had no value.

36

: 00:02:05

But they were actually giving.

37

: 00:02:08

a good critique.

38

: 00:02:10

The presentation at least until

that moment, had not been of value.

39

: 00:02:15

It wasn't a reflection on his program.

40

: 00:02:17

It wasn't a reflection on him.

41

: 00:02:19

It was a reflection on

that current webinar.

42

: 00:02:23

And I thought to myself, wow, he was just

so quick to say, guys, you know, never

43

: 00:02:29

mind, like, just hang up, just go, bye.

44

: 00:02:31

As opposed to taking that

feedback and saying, you know

45

: 00:02:33

what, maybe my presentation.

46

: 00:02:36

is not structured properly.

47

: 00:02:38

Maybe I need to tweak it.

48

: 00:02:40

Maybe I need to give people more.

49

: 00:02:41

Maybe I need to talk about

myself less because this is not

50

: 00:02:45

driving the impact that I want.

51

: 00:02:47

If multiple people are saying that

they're not finding value in it, to

52

: 00:02:52

be honest, as a presenter, that's like

the worst thing that you could ever

53

: 00:02:55

experience is people saying that they

don't find value in your presentations.

54

: 00:02:59

Take it from me.

55

: 00:03:00

I do public speaking.

56

: 00:03:01

I do presentations all the time.

57

: 00:03:04

And it is always something

I am hyper aware of.

58

: 00:03:07

It's something I actually

do check ins along the way.

59

: 00:03:10

I'll do many stop points.

60

: 00:03:12

Is this, is this resonating with you?

61

: 00:03:14

Are you learning something here?

62

: 00:03:15

Is this valuable?

63

: 00:03:16

Is this beneficial?

64

: 00:03:17

Because if at any point I ever

get feedback that says no.

65

: 00:03:21

Then I need to pivot immediately.

66

: 00:03:23

I can't wait till the next presentation.

67

: 00:03:25

I have to fix it then and there because

that's where my audience is, and I

68

: 00:03:29

might not get another opportunity.

69

: 00:03:32

And so for this presenter, he really

missed an opportunity to think outside the

70

: 00:03:36

box or think on the fly and just try to

change his presentation so that it could

71

: 00:03:41

actually bring value to the attendees.

72

: 00:03:46

People still stayed around, but in the

end, a lot of people, myself included,

73

: 00:03:49

end up hanging up because I just

couldn't figure out what the value was.

74

: 00:03:54

And it's not my job to

figure out the value.

75

: 00:03:57

It's the presenter's job to convince

me of the value and not even convince

76

: 00:04:01

me they should just provide value

and make it so obvious that I

77

: 00:04:05

immediately say, yes, this is amazing.

78

: 00:04:07

This is so helpful.

79

: 00:04:08

I want to dig deeper.

80

: 00:04:11

So.

81

: 00:04:13

That's the message don't just be so used

to the way you do things and only looking

82

: 00:04:18

at something through your perspective,

only hearing your voice, that you're so

83

: 00:04:22

confident in whatever it is you're doing,

that you've drowned out everybody else's

84

: 00:04:26

opinion, you've drowned out everybody

else's feedback, especially the feedback

85

: 00:04:30

of those that you want to listen to you.

86

: 00:04:34

Sometimes there can be negative feedback

and you have to close your ears to that.

87

: 00:04:38

But if multiple people are saying the

same thing over and over again, take it

88

: 00:04:42

under consideration and step back and say,

Is there merit in what they're saying?

89

: 00:04:48

Is it possible I might need to tweak

something or improve something?

90

: 00:04:52

Or is it possible that if I

utilize their feedback, I can

91

: 00:04:56

develop a better version of myself?

92

: 00:04:58

Or Or a better product, or a

better service, or whatever

93

: 00:05:01

it is that you're doing.

94

: 00:05:04

We weren't made to be in

this earth by ourselves.

95

: 00:05:06

So people's opinions do matter.

96

: 00:05:09

It doesn't mean that they have

to be the end all and be all.

97

: 00:05:11

We shouldn't just live in a world

with only our opinion, because

98

: 00:05:15

then we would all be in little

earths by ourselves, but we're not,

99

: 00:05:17

we're all on one planet together.

100

: 00:05:20

So part of community, that exchange,

that reciprocity, give and take.

101

: 00:05:25

So make space to hear other

people's opinions and just see,

102

: 00:05:30

because it might be mirroring and

reflecting something back to you.

103

: 00:05:33

That's important and you

don't want to miss it.

104

: 00:05:36

Until next time, continue to serve

yourself, your loved ones, and

105

: 00:05:39

your communities from a full cup.